September
28
There is so much to say
But the words won’t come out
Thoughts get in the way
To silence my shout
There is so much to say
I don’t know where to start
Something about the way
Things have come apart
The blade is my friend, my sunshine my rain
The scars help remind me, make me feel again
It’s just a little blood, not like suicide
It tingles with excitement, to know that I’m alive
I need to hide
I need to feel
I need to cut
I need to heal
Inspired by the book titled Cut by Particia McCormick
September
25
All my friends they think I’m crazy
All my friends they wonder why
Why I’m always writing sad songs
All those words that make them cry
My friends think that I’m not OK
My friends, they always ask me why
I ‘m so obsessed with dark emotions
Why can’t I sing a lullaby?
So here it is my happy song, dedicated to my friends
Let them see the sunshine in me, let them know that I’m not bent
My song will make the whole world smile, my song will shine and set them free
Even if I’m torn inside, while thoughts of sadness torment me
Don’t you know that I can make it?
Don’t waste your worry, don’t ask why
The happiness, well I can fake it
Dance and sing ‘cause I’m not shy
So my friends, they know me too well
The feelings that I try to hide
The heart I pour into my songs
Emotions that I can’t deny
September
22
The day the sun finally came out
Is the day you said good bye
I thought that I’d be devastated
I thought that I would die
But instead I’m feeling alright
Wanna spread my wings and fly
Finally free from these emotions
Tears of joy, that’s how I cry
And now I see the sun, the hope to find the moment
Where this had all begun, before this life got broken
And now I can remember, the things that made the day
Forgotten ever after, that was lost along the way
I know it’s hard to say good bye
To all the memories we shared
In the past I’ve hesitated
But now I know and I’m not scared
No longer trapped in your emotions
I’m finally free from all the pain
Leaving behind your dark reflection
Finding the strength to live again
September
4
How could I have been so blind?
To think that I could change anything
Your emotions left me far behind
I stood by you despite everything
In your world I’m just an anchor
Someone you can blame for everything
Shut me up, I face your anger
Why can’t you explain anything?
And I can’t find the words to say
If you can’t change, I’m on my way
I don’t know why I can’t decide
Will this feeling ever change inside
And if I can’t find the reasons to stay
I know in time you’ll see my way
Over and over…I can’t decide
Will this feeling ever change inside
How can I live this fantasy?
Another life that means everything
Stuck here in this cold reality
I’m in the shadow, I don’t mean anything
You hate me but you want to love me
I can’t pretend to be your everything
Your problems are so far beyond me
I’m helpless, I can’t do anything.
July
22
Where does this feeling come from?
Time after time it haunts me so
The fear of death grips my body
Tearing out my heart and soul
Is it real or just a nightmare?
I can’t seem to wake my soul
It’s left my body far behind
It’s gone beyond my control
Make it stop, I‘m terrified
I wanna run, but I’m paralyzed
I need to breathe, my pulse is fading
Trying to escape this death awaiting
Don’t let me drown in the light
That swallows me up burning bright
Need the touch of a gentle hand
To wake me back to life again
My body leaves my soul, taking a dangerous stroll
I’m terrified it won’t return, forever in hell I will burn…